Steel Dawn is the Future

You know, after watching that crappy new western “Hostiles” with Christian Bale, it got me thinking how much better the average movie was circa 1987-1988. And it got me thinking even more about how awesome Patrick Swayze’s too-little seen sci-fi western “Steel Dawn” is. A direct, complete rip-off of “Shane” and a precursor to 1998’s “Soldier” with Kurt Russell, “Steel Dawn” takes place in a post-apocalypse future where life isn’t worth squat, at least until Swayze materializes as a Mad Max type who (with his buddy Brion James) must protect young widow Lisa Niemi (who became his wife) and her young son (who resembles Annakin Skywalker in “The Phantom Menace”) from evil Anthony Zerbe (always great in movies like this). Swayze’s path to salvation involves many one-on-one battles, souped-up futuristic vehicles and props, and an unconsummated (at least on-screen) romance. Besides Swayze, James, and Zerbe, the film is notable for music by Brian May (“The Road Warrior”) and direction by Lance Hool (“Missing in Action 2: The Beginning.”)


Let’s face it. The world is heading downhill. Many countries are failing. Whether it is North Korea, Syria, or Venezuela people are starving and fighting over food, and other scarce resources. Greece and other countries are next. Someday it will be the USA where people fight in the streets for scraps. Even countries that are rich in natural resources, such as Venezuela cannot get their oil industry up and running, due to leftist hubris. Libya, South Africa, and many African nations are nothing short of anarchy. Welcome to the new dawn of mankind.

Why do I like “Steel Dawn” so much more than the critically acclaimed flop “Hostiles”? Because it knows what kind of movie it wants to be. And it warns us about our abysmal future. Unlike Bale, Swayze never has to think or do any actual acting; he just kicks ass and takes names! “Steel Dawn” doesn’t have a thought in its head, but it’s a terrific low-budget action spectacular sorely in need of a Blu-ray release. If you can find a copy of this on VHS (or DVD if you’re a snob), so it, and thank me later! And by the way, for his roles in this film, “Uncommon Valor,” “Red Dawn,” “Next of Kin,” “Road House,” and “Point Break,” we are inducting the late and sorely missed Swayze into the Hall of Fame! Hopefully this bad-ass mofo is laughing his ass off in heaven! Until next time…

Author: Lord Beardschlimmer Wilhelm Bartholomew III

Leading the charge against societal decay!