Randy Quaid Will Crush Bernie Sanders

Bernie Sanders and his liberal ilk had better watch out. There’s a new sheriff in town. And his name is Randy Quaid. Quaid, of Vacation and Christmas Vacation fame, is taking on Bernie Sanders for his Senate seat. He has a reality TV show documenting his run. Quaid is a big time Trump supporter, and has enough of an independent streak to merit consideration from all sides.


His detractors will posit that Quaid is a mental case and should not be elected. It’s true he was put under house arrest while on the run from authorities for trespassing, vandalism, and unpaid hotel dues. He claimed that ‘star-wackers’ were out to get him. Probably the same people that killed David Carradine, Robin Williams, and Whitney Houston. Is Quaid nuts? No. Many Hollywood stars get in drug, real estate, credit card, and real estate debt. They are subject to termination by drug-dealers and loan sharks. Just like there is a shadow government, which Trump is fighting – there is also a shadow industry in Hollywood and the lime-light, in which dirty leeches suck the blood of the entertainment industry talent.

What makes Quaid qualified? Quaid, with his skepticism of Hollywood and government, and his innate understanding about the failures of liberalism (as evidenced by his portrayal of the dependent mooch uncle in Vacation) is just what Vermont needs. A good kick to the nuts of liberalism. Ok you want to pay higher taxes for do-gooder stuff??? OK , but you will have to house and pay for those dreamers yourself. You want free health care for all??? Ok but don’t be surprised if all the indigents and illegals cut in front of you in line at the hospital (and steal your cell phone to make expensive long-distance calls to Mexico city). You want communism? Ok, but you will have to let that homeless junkie ‘borrow’ your new BMW then.

Also, we have previously done a Randy Quaid tribute here at Groin. And we would like to mention that he is a very multi-dimensional actor, unlike DeNiro and Meryl Streep. Quaid can play LBJ. He can play Lenny from Mice and Men. He can play the cannibal dad in Parents. And we are quite certain that he can play Senator from Vermont better than PC socialist Bernie Sanders.

Personally, I would vote for Randy Quaid any day.

‘The Room’ A Post-Modern Masterpiece

The film sensation surrounding the success of the strange cult film the Room has been misunderstood as the glorification of mediocrity. On the surface this is true.

(Link to trailer for ‘The Room’) :


But really this film is a post modern classic which tells a deeper story of male disenchantment in a world of upside down and self centered morality. Not to mention that the rent is too high and the city smells like garbage (with homeless people everywhere).

In the film the protagonist has a cheating no good , not that hot fiancé. She is self centered to the point of having no empathy for anyone. She acts only upon her own dominant whims. The friends and neighbors in the story are all kind of just ‘there’, causing problems with their own moral obliviousness.

The hero of the film lives a romantic and self determined lifestyle, and is moral to a fault. He cannot survive in a depraved , self centered city such as SF. Cuts which people thought were stupid, such as the café ordering scenes, are thoughtfully placed throughout the film to emphasize the shallow nature of modern city life.

The concept of the room is not just the one room the hero bangs his fiancé and kills himself in. The room is a metaphor for the soulless, morally bankrupt city of SF. The long screen shots of the Golden Gate bridge are meant to warn the viewer that SF sucks, and the hero is thinking of jumping off the bridge. The film is meant to channel Camus’s classic novella The Fall.

The viewer is left with the gripping reality that we all have contributed to the death of the hero. As we have ‘torn him apart!’

Presumed Innocent Sequel Prevails

In the late 1980’s Scott Turow’s first novel “Presumed Innocent” set the publishing world aflame with its sexual explicitness and its dense, riveting mystery. It was a number one best-seller and was turned into a classic thriller film with Harrison Ford. Twenty years later, Turow came out with a sequel called “Innocent” which is not sexually explicit but does have just as riveting a mystery. Why does it work so well?

At the end of “Presumed Innocent,” the protagonist Rusty Sabich is acquitted of murder charges. At the beginning of “Innocent,” he gets implicated in a woman’s death again-this time, his wife’s. He ends up on trial again and even his loving son Nat wonders if he is guilty or not. Further complicating matters is Anna, Nat’s girlfriend, who used to be lovers with Rusty and may have some involvement with the wife’s death. As the trial goes on, the twists and turns continue.

“Innocent” is a spellbinding thriller because it keeps you guessing till the end. The guessing is not so much who killed whom as it is what twist and turn in the trial is coming up next. The novel is told from the point of view of several different characters, which actually helps build suspense about what’s going to happen. Several characters, such as Rusty and the prosecutor Tommy Molto, have complicated character arcs and many good and bad character traits. That sort of complexity is a breath of fresh air in an age of writing for dummies. I was spellbound through 400+ pages of this book, and by the end I felt I had been put through the literary ringer. In short, if you’re looking for a great thriller, try “Innocent”!

On Exoskeletons

Exoskeletons are the future. Right now they are used for people missing limbs to walk mostly. The applications for exos are broadening now to help workers lift boxes and basically make humans stronger and more durable. Wartime applications of super-human strength seem obvious too. Or how about putting an exoskeleton on your dick and hammering that woman you love’s love mound into orgasmic ecstasy after you got tired from the first couple rounds. Ford and Ekso Bionics ( a $2 stock) https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/EKSO/ are teaming up to work on an exo suit for use in the workplace.



Death Wish 4: Just Say No. Or Else!

One of the most underrated film series, the “Death Wish” series, triumphs again with “Death Wish 4: The Crackdown.” A 1987 Cannon film starring Charles Bronson, it finds legendary vigilante Paul Kersey (Bronson) EXTREMELY angry when his live-in girlfriend’s daughter dies as a result of a drug overdose. Rather than letting the authorities handle it, Bronson becomes a one-man army again and kills off anyone with any connection to drugs. Apparently a fan of “Yojimbo” and “A Fistful of Dollars,” Bronson pits two drug cartels against each other resulting in MASSIVE casualties.

This film features a woman saying about her sleazy date “I wish he’d drop dead!” right before he gets thrown off a building and onto her taxi. It also features this classic dialogue exchange: “I can be real nasty when I want to be.” Bronson: “So can I!” This film has a shootout at the end in a roller-skating rink/video games. It has Bronson watching the gangs in partially open doors in hotel rooms and NOT BEING NOTICED! It has Bronson killing people with bazookas and grenade launchers. It has a completely gratuitous dream sequence. It even has Danny Trejo in it! This flick doesn’t seem like much at first but then it surprises. I love the extreme anti-drug message; apparently you’re likely to die from your first hit of cocaine! Available for $10 on Blu-ray as part of a “Death Wish Triple Feature” with “Death Wish 2” and “Death Wish 3,” this is an exploitative delight and not to be missed by fans of good trash!