Sully – A Boring Film About Mustaches


Going into this film you already know that they land the plane safely. The plane doesn’t even nosedive or anything, it just glides onto the Hudson. The plot heads to a pointless bureaucracy type deal (welcome to America). Me personally – I’ve experienced a 10 thousand foot straight drop in an airliner. And I will tell you its much more exciting than this piece of shit poor excuse of a movie displays. The freggin’ foodcarts went flying down the aisles. Stewardesses went flying 30 feet back and hit their heads and got knocked out. Kids threw their hands up in the air and yelled “Woohoo!” – as if on a rollercoaster. But not in this film –
what you get in this film is a lot of close-ups of nicely groomed mustaches.


Tom Hanks grew out his mustache a lot for this film. And Aaoron Eckhart ( or however you spell his over-rated name) also did a lot of mustache grooming for this film. I guess that since they put so much dedication into their mustache grooming that I am supposed to start feeling all patriotic when I watch this movie/ But instead it makes Americans look like a bunch of spoiled pussies who make a big deal out of a wimpy plane landing.
Also duly noted is the fact that the main character (Hanks) spends half the movie on his cell phone with his wife. I got to love this trend of having to watch main characters make lengthy boring cell phone calls after I have been told to silence my own. Don’t we go to movies to get away from phones??
Anyhow , mustache or no mustache, this film is a raging piece of donkey crud – certainly deserving of numerous Razzie awards. No doubt Hanks will get another undeserved Oscar instead. I would give this film negative nine-hundred-and-eleven stars. –“Deplorable” Steve

P.S. Don’t go pay to see this movie. The following link will give you your fill of mustaches for free instead!:


Rise of the Sexbots (Chapter 4)

Chapter 4

The Pop Princess Selection System

The scene’s beginning is where FUDGE-A and ESKIMOSA are still covered by the SKATER’s guns have lead the SKATERS to give them meg at a Pick n’ Pull junkyard.

They are charged by barking dogs who surprise them in the dark. The dogs are shown to be at the end of their chains out of harm’s way for now though.

GOOGAMOOGA: So where’s the stuff?

FUDGE-A: Come over here.

FUDGE-A leads the group to a counter decorated with used car parts. A salesman

wearing the W.O.P. insignia bounces to life.

SALESMAN: What do you want?

GOOGAMOOGA: We’re looking for meg.

SALESMAN: I don’t know what you’re talking about. You shouldn’t be out here.

TRISH: We want some shit.

SALESMAN: The portapotty’s been busted for a year now. You can let ‘er rip outside

the property.

KANGAZOO: Okay, joker. How about some Tums.

SALESMAN: Oh it’s Tums you want. That’ll be five tetra.

KANGAZOO: We don’t have any tetras. WINGNUT and HECKYL over here said he could hook us up.

SALESMAN: There’s no free rides over here. Why don’t you try hacking into Incel’s server and bootlegging some or something?

KANGAZOO: Now who would go and do a thing like that?


SALESMAN: No tokens no laundry.

FUDGE-A lifts the hood of a broken car and lifts out a teddy bear stuffed with vials.

He grabs a couple of them for their hosts the SKATERS.

FUDGE-A: Consider this a high interest loan. Five tetras now. An extra tetra each day. If you take more than a week we kill you and snatch all your dental work for payment.

This lie satisfies the salesman who lets them go.

FUDGE-A: Come on let’s get out of here.

The W.O.P. bikers lead the SKATERS out of the JUNKYARD infrastructure.

TRISH asks ESKIMOSA, “Is that enough?” as they walk behind the BIKERS.

ESKIMOSA: That’s enough for a team on a 50 gang.

They get back on their motorcycles pulling the SKATERS. They motor past the entrance of the worker’s camp where the mantra “Work for Work’s sake is stamped as a metal sign over the gate.

The W.O.P. bikers, FUDGE-A and ESKIMOSA, lead KANGAZOO, TRISH, and GOOGAMOOGA through a back entrance of Echelon agency. The SKATERS are wearing biker disguises so as not to be detected by the cameras. They’re dressed as bikers. FUDGE-A lets the group in with his badge.

They are first met with resistance by the W.O.P. bikers inside the W.O.P. break room but eventually FUDGE-A and ESKIMOSA explain that they’ve cut a deal with the SKATERS.

FUDGE-A takes the SKATERS to a large dark room where the sun never shines annexed to the lizard base where they can view the sexbots. They’re recharging while connected in a long series to an unseen power source.

FUDGE-A: This is an important part of the worker’s reward system.

ESKIMOSA: The workers get a tetra for every sixty hours performed in the mining operations. The best bot can get 15 tetras for her services in any one of several tunnels connected beneath this zone.

TRISH: I have a funny feeling about this place. We should go.

Ignoring her anxiety, KANGAZOO and GOOGAMOOGA are fascinated by what they are seeing.

KANGAZOO: Who oversees the sexbot exchanges? Is it the lizard overlords?

FUDGE-A: I can see how you would think that. But while the programming and maintenance of the girls is conducted by lizards, the sexbots are self-regulating.

They’re inner most conduits accept the tetra coins and are signaled by She.

KANGAZOO: Who is the She we keep hearing about?

ESKIMOSA: Don’t tell them.

FUDGE-A: What difference does it make? We’re already dead if the old lizards find out what we’ve been telling them.

ESKIMOSA: Alright. But the truth will cost you a tetra.

KANGAZOO: Add it to my tab.

GOOGAMOOGA: Wait a minute. Do you hear that? What is that sound?

In the darkened robot recharge hall, the sound of a woman’s voice reverberates through the metallic gate.

ESKIMOSA: That sound is She. The Echelon scientists found the exact frequency to make the workers’ as docile as possible. They select a natural born woman with the exact pitch and timbre and using programmed timbre deploy poplaver music at focused intervals. These songs override the worker’s autonomic reflexes completely.

GOOGAMOOGA: I never heard of anything like that before.

FUDGE-A: Get a load of this. The lizard promise that She also rents her body

workers. The price is 1,000,000 tetras.

GOOGAMOOGA: What does it cost to get her to stop singing?

FUDGE-A: Come on. We shouldn’t be here too long.

TRISH: (Insightfully) So this little songbird holds millions of people in slavery with TV commercial jingles and nursery rhymes.

FUDGE-A: Yeah, but not us. We’ve stayed out of the barbed wire for two generations because we’re born and bred outside of the system.

GOOGAMOOGA: What about No God Only Pain though?

FUDGE-A: I didn’t say we have a defense against that degree of sonic assault. Nobody has. –Saint Reggie


The Voodoo Wheelchair of Death


There was this dark spacious intersection in Campbell, CA. It was nothing very remarkable. The asphalt was dull with dull yellow and white painted stripes It was a grimy area, near a creek. The large unsuccessful liquor store by it was faltering, its Ethiopian owner stooping to selling cigs to kids. It was quite a grimy area. The laundry mat was old and run-down. A tasty but crummy looking Chinese joint was there too. And the lights took forever too. Hamilton and San Thomas were not a pretty site.

People zoomed by this place in their fancy cars on their way to work at Ebay or Netflix. Since it was near highway 17 which connected to all the other highways in the area. Basically this area was spread out, so hardly anyone walked. There were a few bicyclists every once in a while. One day a young gay black disabled man named Robert set out in his Quickie power wheel chair to head to his medical appointment. Robert had muscular dystrophy or something like that, and it caused him to drool. That didn’t stop him from taking weight lifting classes at De Anza or from wanting to do martial arts. He was a really cheerful and uplifting guy to know. Anyhow the sun was starting to set, and there was quite a glare in the sky, especially with all the summer pollution up above. Robert pulled up into the crosswalk, wrongly assuming the monster SUV would stop for the right turn on red. Needless to say the SUV plowed through him at full-speed, fully accelerating through the impact – and never looking back. And they were blasting horrible sounding rap music with the bass turned up, while leaving a trail of lifeless bones and blood in the street behind their vehicle.

Robert had a fairly small tightly knit group of friends, all of which attended the funeral. Malcolm’s gay lover was in shock and jumped on the coffin as it lowered at the funeral. His mom passed out drunk in the limo. And the priest had gas and did a lousy sermon. But luckily Robert had one kinda chubby brown haired nerd friend named Chuck from back in the day who had gotten very much into voodoo. He had been interested in voodoo ever since he was very young and read the Harvard professors book called Serpent and the Rainbow. He went to Haiti himself while in college and had learned the black arts himself.

Chuck was irate and disturbed that the SUV driver fled and was not caught after mauling Malcolm. He had immediately gone to the crime scene (intersection) and took what he could find in terms of wheelchair and bone/blood frags. There were some chips of paint from where the car had hit, and he saved those too . He set them up at his black voodoo altar in his man-cave. And lit candles all around the room in a hexagon. He went into his herb jars and grabbed poppies, scorpion tails, beetles, and other strange ingredients and ground them into a potion. He had a new Quickie wheelchair that he ordered from Amazon Prime. So he sprinkled the potion on the wheelchair. Next, he did some Latin chants (basically about seeking revenge for his homie) and made a blood offering. Finally, he poured out a Mickey’s 40oz malt liquor over Malcolm’s old high school yearbook. Suddenly the windows flew open, and there was loud banging on all the walls. His blunt lit itself on fire, while shit started flying everywhere. The Ouija Board he had on the table in the corner started to spell something. It said:


Suddenly Robert’s Quickie 5000 wheelchair miraculously transmutated and reconstituted itself from small fragments into its original condition. But it didn’t stop there. It was shiny and mean looking now, and it had hydrolics and started bouncing. The arm rest and siding now had custom detailing saying “Made In Hell” with flames and skulls and dice emanating from it. Its wheels grew to epic proportions- more than eight feet high each! And the damned thing even had hubs with sharp Swiss-made blades sticking out more than 8 inches each. The cushion of the chair was also enormous, and it glowed angrily like a hot coal in a fire. Under the seat were a set of demon teeth, larger than those of any great white shark. And the battery was now the size of a large jet engine’s. The exhaust pipe have out a thick, putrid neon-green cloud of smoke, like that color from Maximum Overdrive. The wheelchair grew so large and tall that it burst through the roof, and squashed all the furniture. Then it loudly set out into the night to seek revenge.

On DVD: High-Rise is an Elite Film


One of the few terrific films so far this year is “High-Rise,” an alternate-future dystopian sci-fi film based on the ’70s cult novel by J,G. Ballard. It’s about a futuristic high-rise which is encompassed by Britain’s entire class system, with the poor on the bottom and going up in class level with each floor. Tom Hiddleston from the “Thor” films and “Marvel’s The Avengers” stars as the newest resident of the buildings, a doctor who is a bit befuddled when both Sienna Miller and Jeremy Irons (who plays the building’s architect) take an interest in him. People in the high-rise seem to have lots of free time, which they spend sun-bathing or socializing at parties. Some of the elite in the high-rise wear baroque-styled garb. There is a certain giddiness in the high rise until the power outages begin and all hell starts to break loose. As the poor work their way up the building total chaos ensues. People start getting chopped into bits in a brutal anarchistic state of nature.

The plot description sounds pretty simple, but actually this movie is pretty hard to follow. My brother and I watched it three times prior to attempting to review it, since its so off-beat and eccentric. So much happens that it’s hard to keep track of it all, but that’s ok because “High-Rise” consistently works as an exercise in surrealism. There is, for example, a gigantic party in which everyone is dressed in sort of Victorian garb while symphonic versions of Abba songs are played by a large orchestra. The scene doesn’t make any sense, but it’s mesmerizing. The film as a whole is funny and sad. It’s funny because it’s very eccentric, but sad because so much of Ballard’s futuristic vision of class strife has come true. This is a very good movie and I highly recommend it, but be ready to pay close attention. It’s a must for fans of offbeat cinema. –CoolAC & Steve

Boycott the NFL!! Fund Groin Instead.

The NFL is getting annoying this year. Its a good time to tune out to the current trends and kick back, read a classic, and listen to a nice film score. You can support Groin by buying rare film score soundtracks from this Ebay store link:

Jerks like Kapernick (or however you spell it) have been dissing the police, the country, and the 911 victims by disrespectfully kneeling or linking arms during the national anthem in “shows of unity”. I hope Trump banishes Kap to North Korea, and he can take it up there! Does Kap really think he is at risk of a police beating? As he drives around in his Lambo?? The 49ers have been in many wife-beater assaults, DUI’s and more in recent years. They should clean up their own act before they cast stones on the police and the nation ! They should be protesting their own domestic violence assaults. Do you remember the 49er knocking his girlfriend out in the elevator while on camera a year or two ago?? That’s what needs to be protested. Stop beating your women NFL. If you want to hit a woman, then find a bondage chick who is into that at least.

These modern leftist NFLers are prima-donna traitor types.  And though I am a long-time Chicago Bears and Raiders fan I will be permanently boycotting the NFL until the league punishes these commie traitor spoiled brats and restores decency to that sport.
I met former Raiders great Lester Hayes at Walmart this weekend. He was raising money for a childrens hospital. I still respect the old time greats of the NFL. But to hell with this new generation of scum. To hell with them! Join the boycott!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There are plenty of other sports to watch. Am through with the NFL for now. –Steve


Lights Out Sucks

fist-ps2-dawning-vid-019 art by Saint Reggie

There have been some good horror films this year, such as “Don’t Breathe.” On the other hand, there are the bad ones like “Lights Out.” “Lights Out” received some good reviews when it opened earlier this summer. The mind boggles as to why after seeing the film. If nothing else, the film proves that total darkness is not automatically scary. While films like “We Are Still Here” find ways to make a spirit in the dark scary, all “Lights Out” can give us is pointless jump scares and an extremely low body count. Another bad thing about the film is the idea that a mentally ill person could be a conduit for malevolent spirits. This is insulting to the many people suffering from mental illness, who need love and friendship, not fear. The idea that darkness equals death is likewise ridiculous. Most of us sleep in darkness and do just fine.

Audiences need to stop supporting horror films that aren’t scary. The success of “Don’t Breathe” shows that there is a real demand for a good horror film that works. But “Lights Out” should’ve gone straight to video. It resembles an even worse film from May, “The Darkness,” a really bad flick in which <SPOILER!> no one dies and an autistic boy is a conduit for demons.

“Don’t Breathe” works much better because it has a simple plot with real terror that is well executed. When the lights out, we fear for the characters because suspense has been established and the director has played fair with the audience. A smart, deranged blind man makes for a great villain,Similarly, “We Are Still Here,” a limited release horror film from last year, works because the spirits are unpredictable and have far-reaching powers. “The Shallows” uses a gigantic shark. By giving the audience a truly menacing antagonist, these films work.

Message to Hollywood: stop with the clichés and pay attention to what works. Stop using mentally ill people as conduits of demons and give us something scary and involving. And remember: darkness itself isn’t scary. Likable people in realistic jeopardy is. “Lights Out” indeed! -CoolAC

Bad Trends


Racist robot beauty contest judges. Prefers whites and Asians. As if we don’t have enough problems with race issues in society already these days:

Taking your sexdoll to ground Zero is too disrespectful:

Eugenics through extreme natural selection, as women freeze their eggs while awaiting the ‘perfect male’:

More signs of a blue -collar trend in fashion towards strictly grunt threads. Ironically, I do not think this is positive. I think its a result of our current economic stagnation that excessively plain working class fashion is in (like in Hunger Games or 1984):


Carrying cell phones in pocket causes sperms to die:

Scientists have named a parasite after the current president:

World’s ugliest sexdoll:


Clumsy bots are bumping into people at conventions. Meanwhile robot fashions are in on the catwalk at high-end fashion shows:


Orgasm injections for women don’t sound very legit:

This new game coming out for the new Sony virtual reality headset coming out next month would be better if you could flirt with real women virtually (like at a virtual bar) rather than flirting with a computer simulation:



Anal Sex Advice (Continued)



How to Have Anal Sex by Nymphenomenal

This continues my previous post, “On Anal,” which covered: Considerations | Prep days before | Ready to start when | General arousal and vagina first | Anal tease | Use plenty of lube

Anal entry by fingering:

Anal sex should start slow and small. Slowly insert a lubed pinky finger into her anus. (Make sure his nails are short and smooth so they don’t scratch her inside.) If she can’t tolerate a finger in her ass, she won’t like anal sex. If she’s ready for more, you can work your way up with anal sex toys like butt plugs to gradually stretch open her anus. It may be uncomfortable at first, but it shouldn’t hurt. Stop if it ever starts to hurt! If she starts to bleed rectally, stop and wait until it fully heals before trying anal sex again. Done correctly, she may feel sore but she shouldn’t bleed. However, slight bleeding and spotting is very common, and usually clears up within a week. If it doesn’t heal in a week, or it hurts a lot, go see a doctor right away.

Anal sex positions for penile insertion:

If neither sex partner has tried anal before, the woman should start on top. If she has had anal sex before, you should start with her preferred sex position for anal entry. If he has had anal sex before, but she hasn’t, and she trusts and prefers him to lead, then he can start on top. Being on top gives her more control, though being on the bottom may make it easier for her to relax her anus. Try these four positions to get started on anal sex:

With her on top, try (1) the cowgirl position, so she can ease herself down onto his penis and go at her own pace. When she’s ready, he may flip her over to a better position for him to thrust or do what he wants.

With him on top, try these positions, from least to most uncomfortable for her: (2) lying face-down flat on her stomach (with her butt up), then (3) doggie-style position (with her butt out at him), and then (4) missionary position (with her lying face-up on her back, with her legs tucked up to expose her butt).

Anal technique, pumping, and sensation:

GO SLOW! Even if she’s aroused, relaxed, and lubed up, she may still feel a lot of discomfort, so he should be patient and go slow for her. Her anus may be very slippery and feel very good so tight (especially compared to the vagina), but he should control himself to enter gradually and carefully, especially if it’s her first time ever trying anal sex, as accidentally slipping in can be traumatic for her.

Insertion of the whole tip of his penis may be the most uncomfortable for her, as it stretches open her anal sphincter up to the size of his shaft. Slowly dip his penis in and out of her, starting with shallow thrusts and slowly pumping in his penis a little deeper every time. Whenever his penis slips out of her anus, be careful to reinsert it without touching her vagina, to avoid introducing fecal germs into the vagina, and to avoid spreading fecal matter that could stain your bed sheets. His angle of insertion can also hurt her if the angle is too sharp. She might feel slightly sore from anal stretching at first. As his penis goes deeper into her anal canal toward her rectum, she may feel like she’s pooping, though she isn’t pooping. If she enjoys taking a good dump, she may find this sensation very pleasurable. After a few minutes, her anus should feel adjusted and relaxed, and then she may find it comparable to vaginal sex but in an adjacent bodily cavity. It’s a thin wall between the anal canal and the vaginal canal, so your dick could be indirectly stimulating her g-spot on her front vaginal wall. Some women can even orgasm through anal penetration, especially with simultaneous stimulation (of her clitoris, vagina, mouth, and skin/whole body). Note that men who are anally penetrated can have their prostate stimulated and massaged, which is not only pleasurable but also healthy, as it deters prostate cancer. Best of all, the man penetrating can cum in her anus without the risk of pregnancy (though anal sex still risks transmitting STDs, plus anal warts and anal cancer, plus fecal infection, so condoms are still highly recommended).


After he cums and finishes in her anus, his penis (or his condom sheath) will be covered in fecal germs (invisible) and also possibly some poop (visible). This is harmless as long as: the used condom is thrown away, and his anally inserted penis is immediately washed off with warm water and soap (and NOT reintroduced into a vagina!). Remember to never reinsert anal probes back into a vagina without first cleaning up and at least putting on a new condom!

After sex, she should cup under her genitals on her way to the restroom, in case his cum drips back out of her. Like for vaginal sex, she should immediately pee to avoid UTIs. She should queef any air pumped into her vagina and/or anus, try to drip out his cum, and possibly even poop. Remember to only ever wipe front to back (never back to front), due to fecal germs! Even better if she can also wash the area with warm water and soap or take a shower.

Note that she may feel a bit sore, and even bleed or spot a bit, which are normal, shouldn’t hurt, and should go away within a week. However, if you: have heavy bleeding, are hurting, feel like you have a tear or cut, feel itchy, or have sores, lumps, or unusual discharge, see a doctor as soon as possible, in case you need to clear up an infection. Make sure the issue is gone, she’s not spotting, and everything is back to normal before you resume having anal sex.

Keep in mind that anal sex may be uncomfortable but should never hurt! A woman may not enjoy it her first time or two, as her anus may need to be stretched out (like a virgin’s hymen may need to be torn from the first few times she’s been vaginally penetrated). But, if after a few tries, a woman still finds no pleasure in being rimmed, fingered in the anus, or having anal sex with you, then anal sex probably isn’t her thing. Then you should stop suggesting it, but give her plenty of credit for having given it a shot and trying something new to spice up your sex lives. Here’s hoping you both discover the joys of anal sex! –Nymphenomenal


Experts Wrong About Sexbot Supremacy

Here is an expert who says sexbots will be supreme to humans sexually:

My take is that that would be an incorrect assumption. It is true that robots have beaten humans in many intellectual endeavors such as chess. And depending if you count machines as robots, then there are many physical tasks which they better humans at. But when you are talking about sex you are talking about a sensual (touch) and mental connection as well. Sensitivity, intuition, even impulsiveness are all facets in which a human will excel beyond the capability of any machine.

How about the classic example of angry sex, revenge sex, make-up sex etc. ?? Women dig that stuff and no bot will provide that catharsis. A robot will obviously be a good sub for bdsm, since its presumably built to obey orders. But people will not get the same thrill out of whipping or paddling a sexbot as they would out a a fine -ass momma human woman. Also lets take a look at other things that were computerized, like EDM (techno). Despite its popularity, techno has caused music to lose its human touch. Which is ironic since the song lyrics tend to be somewhat emotional and “E”-inspired. Or take a look at fake limbs ( like a pump up dick surgery so one’s cock stays hard all the time). I don’t believe the average woman wants that. And while I do recognize that a legit. counterargument can be made for instance the Aussie gold medal winning runner who had robotic legs- its the human element which is attached to the robotic part which provides the emotional drive which makes the physical feat at hand possible.

There are other obvious advantages a sexbot has over a human sexually – in terms of endurance, thrust strength , not getting sore, and more. The idea they would be more hygienic in terms of them staying free of stds would depend whether they are cleaned/shared and remains uncertain in its implications. A sexbot will not be able to provide the same level of mental emotion , sensuality, kinesiology, nor the same level of satisfaction from having connected with that a human will have. I also fear that they could break down and parts could be expensive. And I could see them getting computer viruses and going haywire, or having the government use sexbots to spy on people (along the lines of what Snowden talks about). The average sexbot may offer advantages over the average human. But the truth is that you can’t keep a good man down.

Steve C.

gettygetty2-Getty Images