The news-entertainment media is a product with zero obligation to truth. They keep up the image of truth because it’s part of what keeps you buying the product, but they have no obligation to truth.
They’ll do whatever sells papers, TV minutes, movies, magazines, video games and books.
MRAs have absorbed from these people certain notions that infect all of their other reasoning. The primary one is that liberalism (more individualism, fewer social standards) is the solution to all problems.
Marriage difficult, laws favor women? Let’s do away with marriage then!
Affirmative action blockhead? Let’s demand that we get the right to sue, too!
Society sees men as predators? Let’s insist society doesn’t judge anyone by appearance!
Basically, MRAs end up saying the same dumb stuff that feminists and other liberal lapdogs do: you can’t judge a book by its cover, so treat everyone like a genderless, raceless, cultureless, sexless, and soulless being.
As a man, that defecates all over your hopes and dreams. You want to be known for what you did do: you took a stand on something and defended it. You set up a family and led it a certain way. You created some things, had some ideas, fought hard and rocked on.
Instead, you get all of that thrown out so you can be “equal.”
As an MRA, you have to be truly brain-fucking-dead to endorse this viewpoint, but most of you will because as said above, you’ve absorbed thousands of hours of media telling you this is the only solution.
Who else likes only solutions? Tyrants: Stalin, Mao, Pol Pot, etc.
And instead you miss out on a traditional role for a man, which goal-based and not appearance-based.
In a goal-based society, you always have a purpose: career, family, self-development, nation, and possibly religion.
In an appearance-based society, you must always try to look better than the other guy, and you do that through shallow and insincere acts. Giving bums a few bucks. Donating to the famine in the horn of Africa. Cheering for the feminists. Crying over events in far-off countries.
In other words, everything that’s not you becomes important in an appearance-based society. On the other hand, everything that defines who you are as a person — underneath the appearance and the social group — is totally lost. You don’t exist. A social clone of you does.
Sometimes it’s better to have a goal, and because you’re on the path to that and in the right place, not worry about appearance or the details.
When I’m having sex with someone, I want it to be an unencumbered journey of exploration with a very specific person. I want no map, no “to do” list, no expectations and no goals. Just all in, focusing on the moment, not on the finish line.
In my mind, the focus on the orgasm rather than everything leading up to it, is like focusing on the wedding but not the marriage – pretty much missing the point.
I did my best to explain the performance pressure around having an orgasm. That in many cases, women feel like they have to get there to please the guy, like the guy will feel like a failure if he can’t make you cum. And, of course, we feel like a failure, or like we are flawed and not good enough if we can’t get there. Then the whole focus becomes this one thing, and it’s just too much pressure. Frankly, it’s incredibly hard to have an orgasm under that kind of pressure.
One of my friends is clearly getting it. He explains how he sometimes feels so much pressure to perform, that he’s almost not having fun – which has it’s own obvious repercussions on his performance and pleasure. It’s not dissimilar.
“Imagine if you could remove all that?” I said. “Imagine sex with no pressure, no disappointment, being truly in the moment and not worrying about achieving a goal.” – BlogHer
It’s an interesting parallel.
In the feminized-MRA world, you are a commodity who tries to make your buddies think you’re cool by having sex with underconfident drunk chicks who don’t remember your name.
In the world of men not boys, you are someone who matters because of where he’s going and what he does to get there — not some trivial details of appearance.
A woman feels best having sex with a man who makes sense in all parts of her life. When she’s a girl, that may be the boyfriend of the semester, but then she grows up. By the time she’s 21, she wants a real man. Someone who not only takes her out on dates, but might take her for a lifetime.
In that context, the orgasm is a detail. Without that context, all you have is pressure to perform, and when it’s over, you have nothing.